Sexual Aftercare: How To Find What Aftercare You Need

If you know it, you can ask for it.

What your plans for the weekend? We hope you’ve reserved some sexy time because we’re exploring something integral to sex — aftercare.

If you haven’t yet read the previous posts about aftercare, we highly suggest you do.

But do you know what aftercare you need? Have you ever sat down to determine what comprises aftercare for you?

In this post, we’ll share how to determine the aftercare you need. It can be overwhelming, so we’ll share easy writing prompts that’ll help you identify what aftercare you need.

What is your aftercare like?

Take what you’ve learned through our social media, Carnal Theory interviews, this series on aftercare, and more to inform your inner reflection and self-exploration:

📝 How do I usually feel emotionally and physically right after I have sex?
📝 What are new things I would like to do after sex with my partner(s)?
📝 What can I do after sex to make my experience even more enjoyable?
📝 What are five physical needs I can always identify I have after having sex?
📝 What are five emotional needs I can always identify I have after having sex?
📝 Do I want any objects as part of my aftercare routine? If so, which? (e.g. sex toys, blankets, food, heating/cooling pad.)
📝 What do I want my partner(s) to do to me or with me?
📝 Do I require any specific resources to carry it out?
📝 How can I ask my partner(s) to join me on this in a respectful way?
📝 How can I ask them to tell me what their aftercare needs are?

This voluntary prompt invites you to explore your sexual biography.

We suggest you set aside 20 minutes with your phone on silent and relax in a comfortable space with a pen and paper.

Go slow. Start with what comes to mind from your first read of the prompt. Continue writing from your stream of consciousness.

And what you’ll end up with is a document that describes what aftercare you need. You can share this with your partner to inform them about your needs. And don’t forget, good sex includes foreplay and aftercare :)

Why Sexual Aftercare was originally published on My Sex Bio’s blog on June 15, 2020.

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